dragons and dragons.

Happy Birthday !

Campaign for Junction X:
(I thought if I posted updates, it would remind me work on selling it instead of doing nothing)

Three agent queries sent out.

I got the edit part one back for Transgressions today.  In the post! I wasn’t expecting a handwritten edit… I’ve asked the editor what she wants me to do, edit this hard copy or do the Word version in tracked changes.

I have a query about POV that I need help with though, please – because I just don’t get POV much of the time…  The paragraph is this:

David chafed against hard work.  He hated the forge and he loathed the smallholding.  His natural state of being was one of cheerful indolence, and he would find any way of avoiding word he could, unabashed by his father’s speeches on the merits of toil.  There in keeping, he did not spend more time tha he could avoid, worrying about the inevitable, such as the threat of this father’s censure on his return when he found David’s work undone.

And the editor has marked it as “You are telling, not showing – stay in his POV.”  – please can someone help me re-write this, so I can then use it as a model to rewrite the many other passages that also need to be changed?  I know that I’ve slipped into omniescent pov (I think?) but don’t know how to solve it…

And we now have an Erastes Stud.

Adopt one today!Erastes Syringa
Adopt one today!Erastes Conflagrate
Adopt one today!Erastes Obscura
Adopt one today!Erastes Windwillow
Adopt one today!

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